But It's 1:30 in the Morning!

I don't remember if I worried all the time before I became a mom. But once that little one made his presence known, I started worrying like it could somehow make a difference. I hear horrific stories about accidents happening to kids and then it's all I think about for days. I seriously can get myself all choked up just thinking about some crazy situation where we lose him. It's awful. And of course, the worst stories are about when the mom is right there but can't do anything to help or stop it from occurring. How terrible.

For example, with "baby sister" on the way anyday now (please God!), we've put in our second car seat. Big brother got shifted from the middle to the window, and I realized that he could probably open the door by himself with a little bit of effort. So I switched on the child lock in his door so one can only open it from the outside. Not 10 minutes later I'm driving along, realizing - wait! What if we careen off the edge of a cliff into water below and I climb into the back and get him unbuckled but can't open the door from the inside??? How terrible would I feel then?!?!

I know there are no cliffs beside water anywhere near us. It doesn't matter.

True story: last Friday was the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner for my brother's wedding. After a long, traffic-filled drive (with baby not napping), we arrive at the church late, hormonal, and exhausted. The rehearsal goes off without a hitch and we go to the restaurant for dinner and a few sappy moments. Finally, it's time to head to the hotel and bed. After awhile of settling in and getting acclimated, it's off to bed for Mommy and baby. Time check: 12:30. Daddy heads downstairs to hang out with not-so-pregnant relatives and promises he'll be back soon.

Next thing I know, I'm hearing something like an alarm clock. Is it in our room? Did the last guests foolishly leave it turned on? Wait - but it sounds like it's coming from the bathroom! Weird. Oh - maybe it's just from another room. But why do they need an alarm set for 1:30 in the morning?? Then I hear the voice. A recording. Something about this being an alarm (no kidding) and waiting for further instructions. Oh - and evacuating the building. Hmm. A joke, I'm sure. Then, it's quiet. Thank God. Oh wait - crap! A new alarm. Telling us to evacuate. And footsteps and slamming doors all up and down the hallway. Now I pause.

Remember back in grade school when they had fire drills? Remember how cool it was to leave the classroom and have a break where you got to go outside and slyly whisper to your friends? Remember how awesome you thought it would be if your school burned down? Even though you knew it would never happen? Fast-forward a few years.

I realize I'm on the 7th floor of a building that could potentially be on fire. I just want to ignore it all and go back to sleep! But here I am, a zillion months pregnant and alone with my toddler. I'm SURE it's nothing. But what if it's not? What if this is the time when it's real and the fire makes its way to my door and then I'm stuck and can't get out and I have to jump out the window with my 2-year-old??? Not okay.

So I throw on some clothes, scoop up my sleeping toddler, and stumble out into the hall. Lights flashing, alarm wailing, down the hallway we go. Halfway down I come to a police officer who's telling us that "it's okay." I don't know what that means, but I turn back towards my room. Here comes my knight in shining armor. He'd basically threatened the security guard in the lobby and bolted past him to get to us (my hero!). Grabbing our little guy, he leads me down 7 flights of stairs and out into the night. People are milling about and we realize it's okay to wait in the lobby. In we go - I'm dangerously close to tears. A few minutes later they announce it's okay to go back up. Someone had been smoking on our non-smoking floor. If I ever meet that moron....

Needless to say, it took us awhile to get settled back in for the night. And I felt stupid. Of course it was nothing! I should've just stayed in bed! But...[sigh]...I'm a mom. And moms don't often get that option.