To the Mean Lady at IKEA

Dear Mean Lady,

You hit my kid. In the head. With a door.

In your rush to get to the bathroom 'in time,' you knocked over a 30-lb toddler who was minding his own business, waiting for Mommy to wash up.

Next time you go barrelling into a room, be sure there are no small children behind the door. Oh, and if there IS one, and you DO knock into him, please be sure to APOLOGIZE. It's only polite.

For good measure, if he's screaming and crying, and his mom is trying to calm him down on one side and holding a baby girl on the other side, do the mom a favor and OFFER SOME HELP! Even if it's only to go get someone else! Yeah, you asked if he was bleeding. And when I assured you he was not, you ran away, clearly glad there was no lawsuit in the wings.

You're mean. I just wanted you to know.

Sincerely,
The Quietly-Seething Mommy who now wishes she'd bitten your head off when she had the chance!

She's Back!

So, yeah. I DID fall off the face of the earth! And it was not a beautiful view. Oh well. I'm back on solid ground once again and have lots to share. Let me know what you want to hear about!

-Little Man's first train ride
-our gift upon returning home from vacation
-our family's new sport
-finding ancestors
-the milk challenge
-Mommy's trip
-car breakdown
-mean old lady at IKEA
-thoughts on Baby Girl turning one

Let me apologize for not being available for your chuckling pleasure. It must have been hard to head to this blog day after day, not knowing when I'd return, only to find...nothing new. Fear not! I will once again be filling your frivolous time with witty rants about the joys and guilts of motherhood. Til next time....

Status Report

I wish I could report that it was terrible. That I ate it and it tasted disgusting and that I was sick all night. I did have a headache the next day, and felt a bit of nausea, but it's a sacrifice I could make...for cheesecake. Baby girl had a rough night, but it's hard to know for sure if it was the milk, or the humidity, or maybe just her teeth. Either way, I'm not ready to jump back into a dairy-filled life. It'll be interesting to see what happens with her test on Wednesday.

It All Ended With Cheesecake

I knew it would. After 8 months, 4 days, 21 hours, 43 minutes, and 4 seconds, I had my first taste of dairy & soy - in a mouth-watering piece (okay, pieces) of brownie fudge cheesecake. I kept telling my husband how disgusting it was, but he couldn't understand me with my mouth stuffed full.

Next week they want to do a milk-challenge test on our little girl. With whole milk. It kinda freaks me out, so I decided to go ahead and see what milk would do to my body after this long. Likewise, it'll go through my system to hers, and she'll have a chance to ingest it moderately. We'll let you know how it goes!

You Know It's Been A Long Time Since You Did The Laundry...

when your children have outgrown the clothes you're washing!

Five Hours

I'm supposed to get 5 straight hours of sleep each night. Doctor's orders. I haven't slept through the night for over a year. Sleep deprivation - it does things to ya.

Last night was attempt number one. Baby girl was super gassy and didn't fall asleep until 10:20p. No joke. Mommy fell asleep shortly after that. On the couch. Little Man awoke saying he "just wanted to get out of bed!" at 1:30a. After settling him down, I climbed into bed. At 3:30a, Miss Muffet figured it was time to nurse. 5:30a and she was up again. Little Man was calling to us that it was "light out!" at 6:30a. And the Little Miss was up-and-at-'em at 7:30a.

So much for night number one. Longest stretch - approximately 3 hours.

Since You Asked...

What's in YOUR Wallet?

Contents of my diaper bag (in no particular order):

• digital camera
• empty packaging for Sir Topham Hatt's car
• pink stuffed bunny rabbit
• overstuffed wallet
• 2 empty baggies
• "Lollie Lamb" book - copyright 1949
• baggie with remains of trail mix snack
• jar of Gerber squash
• jar of Gerber sweet potatoes
• package of pacifier wipes
• thin navy blue headband
• pink waffle headband with white flower
• 5 size three Pampers diapers
• 1 size six Pampers diaper
• mini Fisher Price Doodle-Pro
• 2 packages of Hershey's Kissables
• plastic spoon in wrapper
• 2 plastic spoons out of wrappers
• pair of pink Robeez shoes
• toddler spork
• JJ Cole pacifier holder
• pair of baby leggings (handmade by moi from Gymboree socks!)
• 2 toddler spoons
• 3 noise makers from the inside of old toys
• toddler-size plastic ring
• figure-eight teether
• baggie with toddler fork and knife
• cell phone
• artwork done by son during church
• $10 Stop&Shop gift card
• 2 fake coins
• directions to friends' house with blog ideas listed on back
• 2 sticks of melted gum
• 2 dried-out baby wipes
• odd assortment of receipts
• old shopping list
• Vacation Bible School registration form
• 7 1/2 loose Cheerios
• ladybug sticker
• miniature golf score card
• handful of Blueberry Eyes Design business cards
• Bath & Body Works Orange Ginger travel-size body lotion
• roll of stamps (unopened)
• camera memory card case (empty)
• pad of post-it notes
• blank Ready Post address label
• orange spinning top
• egg shaker
• 1 pink sock (note - not one pair)
• box of 4 crayons from California Pizza Kitchen
• Safety 1st baby hairbrush
• korker bow
• itty-bitty pink bow
• Baby Orajel, Nighttime Formula
• 4 (likely dead) Energizer batteries
• sermon notes from June 14th
• "application for a US Passport by Mail"
• 10 1-cent stamps
• "Stamps Delivered to your Mailbox" brochure
• 4 thank-you cards for son's birthday party (over a month ago!) - sorry!
• list of dairy- and soy-free items available at Stop&Shop
• 4 pads
• 6 tampons
• Daddy's sunglasses
• toddler sunglasses
• Mommy's (previously assumed lost) sunglasses
• 3 pens
• 1 pencil
• 4 loose mini-markers
• infant toothbrush (unknown history - ew!)
• 5 infant spoons
• baggie of Cheerios
• 2 1/2 pieces of Hubba Bubba bubblegum, still in package
• blue race car

I'm clearly prepared for anything. Especially if it requires utensils!