How Hard Could It Be?

Our little one has been having a difficult time with nursing. And of course, I'm feeling like a failure all over again. My little guy didn't quite figure out how to latch on until he was almost a week old. This sweet thing latched on right after birth and did wonderfully...in the hospital. Once we got home, she slowed way down, her weight plateaued, and she seemed to have trouble with her latch. I was devastated. After all, this is baby #2 - I should know a few things this time around!

Yesterday we went to a lactation consultant. I left feeling terribly overwhelmed. Loaded with information about food sensitivities, a therapy I couldn't pronounce, and dietary changes, I drove home wondering if I could truly give up dairy. The best part of the visit was learning that our little girl was tongue-tied. Easily-remedied, I was assured.

Today we went to the pediatrician. I left feeling sick to my stomach and wondering if I had just doomed my little girl to a life of speech issues or dental concerns. I was the one holding her tiny head while the doctor snipped the tongue-tie. I almost passed out. Blood I can handle. My not-quite-3-week-old screaming bloody murder, I could not.

So now I'm just shaky. In the long run, I think we made the right choice - but I hate having to be the one to make the choice.

While the poor thing slept, I got Big Brother ready for his nap. As I changed his diaper I realized that it has been a very long time since I worried about every meal he ate (or didn't), every one of his diaper's contents, every funny sound and strange reaction he made. I guess somehow, we all make it through. Moms and kids alike. I guess I just figured it would be easier the second time around. Silly me.