Labor of Love

-from Andrew Peterson's Behold the Lamb of God

It was not a silent night
There was blood on the ground
You could hear a woman cry
In the alleyways that night
On the streets of David’s town

And the stable was not clean
And the cobblestones were cold
And little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
Had no mother’s hand to hold

It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love

Noble Joseph at her side
Callused hands and weary eyes
There were no midwives to be found
In the streets of David’s town
In the middle of the night

So he held her and he prayed
Shafts of moonlight on his face
But the baby in her womb
He was the maker of the moon
He was the Author of the faith
That could make the mountains move

It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love
For little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
It was a labor of love

Merry Christmas everyone!

Dairy Diary

Monday: We find out baby girl has a milk protein allergy. Two options - formula, or Mommy goes dairy-free. I opt for the latter, but don't have lunch til 3:30 since I have no idea what to eat. Phone call to nutritionist reveals Little Miss needs to be a patient for them to talk to us. Appointment made for Wednesday.

Tuesday: Peanut butter and jelly for lunch, pasta for dinner. Mommy's 6-week postpartum visit became a 12-week postpartum visit. Midwife wishes us the best of luck with going dairy-free.

Wednesday: 8:20 appointment at the Children's Hospital. We don't leave until 1:30. Peanut butter and jelly for lunch. Pasta for dinner. Nutritionist calls to say she'll email us the milk-free/soy-free information. Turns out no soy either. Unfortunately, she can't find it and will have to fax it tomorrow.

Thursday: Appointment with breastfeeding-specialist-who-used-to-be-a-pediatrician goes very well. She gives us lots of tips and ideas, but doesn't want to be "another cook in the kitchen" on the matter of dairy-free living. We'll wait to talk to the nutritionist. Daddy realizes he's left the fax at work, so heads back for a 10pm visit to the office, followed by a run to the grocery store for lots of fruits and veggies. Bagel for breakfast. Peanut butter and jelly for lunch. Too upset to eat dinner.

Friday: Snowstorm means the nutritionists left early. Daddy's sent home early from work. Salad for lunch. Pasta (with meat!) for dinner. Upset stomach through the night...detoxing??

Have You Ever...

...seen four different doctors in four days?

...called food companies to check on their ingredients?

...held a screaming baby while they took a vial of her blood?

...waited 3 1/2 hours for a little one to have a bowel movement, just so they could tell you that the first test was right?

...had a pap smear while holding a screaming baby on your chest?

Welcome to My World....

Feeding My Baby Razorblades

For three months I have struggled to feed her. For three months I have agonized over every feeding. Three months I've cried. Three months she's screamed.

And now we know why. I've been feeding her razorblades.

At least, that's what it feels like inside her tiny little belly.

Turns out baby has a milk protein allergy. And all that nursing, and all those tears. Well, now we have answers.

The long and short of it is that I either need to stop eating all dairy, or we put her on formula and hope she grows out of it. I've decided to continue breastfeeding. For better, or for worse. And I'm really hoping there is no 'worse.'

The irony in all this - and there's plenty! - is that I had just said the following words aloud: "You know, she really seems to be nursing so much better!"

Shows what I know.

What You WANT to Hear

Yes, it's so great to have two kids! A boy and a girl - just what we always wanted!

Oh no - we're getting plenty of sleep!

She only wakes once in the night!

And her brother doesn't wake up at all anymore!

She's nursing like a champ!

I am so glad we did all we had to do to get everything fixed!

Oh, we're doing so well now!

Yes, I try to get us out of the house everyday!

Sometimes we even play in the yard!

It's so much easier than I thought it would be!

I can't believe all the help and support we've been given!

I'd highly recommend this to anyone who was considering it!

Really, I did all that worrying for nothing!

And how are YOU these days?

It's Christmas!

Jesus was once a teeny-tiny baby who had to learn to laugh.

He was swaddled in a "receiving blanket" so he wouldn't startle himself with his flailing arms and legs.

Mary probably tucked a curl of his hair behind his ear and pondered the shape of his earlobe.

The King of Glory cried in a wet diaper because his parents were too busy to notice he had soiled himself.

Before his parents were ready, he announced to them, "I can do it myself!"

It's astounding to me to look at my sweet little girl and think that my God was that little once. That his mom may have checked to make sure he was still breathing. That his dad would have held him close and let him fall asleep on his chest. That he gave up all Heaven holds to come down and suffer the indignity of gas pains. Of learning to walk. Of sneezing.

My little boy thinks hard to come up with words to tell us what's on his mind. Jesus knew Wonders Mysterious, yet might have asked "Who this made?" Did he call his mom "sweetheart'?

Christmas is such a magical time of year. And yet there's no magic involved. A tiny baby was born. His mom cried to see how beautiful he was. And because she was glad she wasn't pregnant anymore. Everything was so normal. But he'd grow to change what the word 'normal' meant.

First Date

11 years ago this coming February, we had our first date. We took the subway to Harvard (or, Hah-vid, as I was once in the habit of saying) for a concert. Caedmon's Call was performing and they had two singers open for them: Andrew Peterson and Bebo Norman. It was their first time performing together.

Fast-forward 11 years. In October we celebrated our 6th anniversary. I hunted around for a gift and came across a concert: "Behold the Lamb of God." It's our favorite Christmas album (you can listen to this one year-round!) and I knew he'd love it. Performers included Andrew Peterson and Bebo Norman, among others. I bought the tickets, thinking "baby will be two months old then, things will be fine."

Hubby had a surprise for me on our anniversary. He had designed two "tickets" to the show - and wanted to know if we could go. I whipped out the tickets I had already purchased. It would be a date.

And so tonight we left baby #2 for the first time. She had never successfully taken a bottle. I was on the verge of tears. But we survived. And Mommy and Daddy had a chance to be Husband and Wife for the first time in a long time. A new kind of "first date." And I only thought about the baby a little. Well, a little for me.

Why God, Why?

Could someone please tell me WHY the doctor's waiting room is chock-full of people when your little one is screaming like you're killing her, but totally EMPTY! when you leave with your sweet little sleeping bundle???

Just Give Me the Epidural! (vol. 1)

Our Bradley Method instructor once told us that the reason she chose natural childbirth was because "there are no epidurals for life." I've decided I want to change that here and now. There are so many things in life that call for one! Here's just the beginning:

1. I want an epidural for breastfeeding. Ouch!


2. I want an epidural for interactions with my mother-in-law. [I'm so going to be in trouble for writing this.]


3. I want an epidural for our sad little car. Honestly, we don't even try to put it in reverse anymore!


4. I want an epidural for our housing situation. [I really, really, really want to stop having a landlord who is also my mother-in-law. Oh, and see #2. I'm really in trouble now!]


5. I want an epidural for losing the baby weight. And I mean baby #1 weight.


The anesthesiologist will be tired of me before my requests are over....